Port Adelaide austerity protests enter second day
The Port Adelaide Football Club’s playing list took to the streets of Adelaide again this morning in protest against a raft of new austerity measures designed to forestall a costly debt overhaul…
Historic AFLPA meeting ends in farce as O’Brien refuses to surrender microphone
The AFLPA’s historic meeting to discuss player wages under the new Collective Bargaining Agreement quickly descended into chaos last night following a series of unfortunate, yet predictable, mishaps involving well-known…
Eagles stripped of points as entire playing list tests positive for Methadone
Just a week after the AFL boasted of the success of its illicit drugs policy, the West Coast Eagles were stripped of all premiership points this morning after ASADA confirmed…
Impatient Sandilands considering amputation
Fremantle ruckman Aaron Sandilands has revealed he is considering amputating his troublesome big toe as he grows impatient waiting for his heart to pump blood to the injured region. Sandilands…
Family First announce Justin Sherman recruitment
Following his four-week suspension for racial vilification, the Family First Party have announced that Western Bulldogs midfielder Justin Sherman will contest the seat of Lalor for the party in the…
Bloke who goes for Carlton strangely quiet today
The bloke at work who supports Carlton was strangely quiet today, the Associated Press has reported. Usually infuriatingly opinionated on all matters related to football, he kept his head down…
Cloke thankful for teammates’ instructions when taking shot at goal
Collingwood spearhead and potential felon, Travis Cloke, has thanked his teammates for providing him with invaluable direction after he took a crucial mark in the goal-square during Saturday night’s win…
Channel 7 announce return of mid-90′s commentary team for 2012 season
Following Channel 10′s confirmation they would cease to broadcast AFL after the conclusion of the 2011 season, Channel 7 management announced this morning it would be re-engaging its mid-90′s commentary…
GWS smashes crowd record for game involving Israel Folau
A new record was set last Saturday at Blacktown Olympic Park when an astonishing 1,893 spectators turned out for the NEAFL Eastern Conference clash between GWS and the Sydney Swans. Officials were sent scrambling…
Child prodigy cannot recall Port Adelaide while reciting the 17 AFL teams
Six year-old child prodigy Mahapandit Tagore can do close to anything he puts his mind to. Already undertaking VCE mathematics at Melbourne’s Narre Warren Secondary College, he’s the Victorian under-12′s…
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